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Spit Shine

Journal Entry: Fri May 2, 2008, 11:32 PM
Well, I'll be polishing "This Earth Dragon Crumbles" for this month. I wasn't satisfied with it, and I'll be re-working on it. Of course, I humbly ask for your help as well. Don't sweat it if you can't help me :D I'm mainly looking for tips, suggestions, and ideas. Feel free to ask of me the same, just keep in mind I'm almost a complete amateur at writing :D

But before that, my friend :iconshadowaaronx: would like some comments and help with his poetry. His writing is more romantic skewed than mine, if that helps nudge you over to his gallery.

Anyways...onto the poem. (You can throw your comments on my journal or the original piece here: [link])

This Earth Dragon Crumbles

A pebble, rough and brown.
I gather the earth around me,
as I wake, slowly changing.
Growing wings and tail, taking shape.

I stretch my wings, gently roaring.
The earth reverberates, alerting to my presence.
I protect those that I can, those that cannot defend themselves.
Those that have no where else to turn.

My price, I leave up to you to pay.
All I ask is for you to stand,
stand against your fears, your strife.
To stand up and roar with me.

I am asked to protect precious daughters,
to safe guard the deepest of secrets.
I am asked to watch over dogs, and cats,
even to guard the premises of empty mansions.

People turn to me, asking me.
For help, for advice, for entertainment.
Taking for granted my strength,
never paying attention to my wounds...

I am a protector, I am a guardian.
But even I need help,
help to overcome the pain.
The fear of failure, the fear of success.

People place their hopes and dreams,
their problems and worries.
on my shoulders. That precious cargo.
Dragging me down, crushing my wings.

Plummeting from the sky I cherish,
I roll onto my back, protecting my charges.
To the very last.
I hit the ground, shattering into infinite chips.

At least they are safe,
the hopes and dreams.
I am content, reduced.
A pebble, rough and brown.

  • Mood: Love
  • Listening to: Etro Anime, Nickleback, Nightwish
  • Reading: Magician:Apprentice - Raymond E. Feist
  • Watching: Neon Genesis Evangelion
  • Playing: Halo 3, N+, Blue Dragon, COD4
  • Eating: subway
  • Drinking: water

Devious Comments

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=Demoneangelo:iconDemoneangelo: May 3, 2008, 7:31:55 AM
Ooo, 'tis shineh :nod:

--
Faith in humanity points: 345 out of 365
~NightVagabond:iconNightVagabond: May 3, 2008, 12:21:33 PM
Sure it's shineh, something seems a little off to me though. I'll be more likely to find out what it is, with the poem right in my journal :D

--
The lion within, I roar
I stretch my bow, let arrow soar,
to protect your love.